I was on the paper staff in 8th grade.
I have the papers to prove it.
In the four papers that I kept I only contributed maybe five measly articles.
It seems that my inability to concentrate made itself manifest again in my life.
I'm starting to see quite the picture of myself as a youth.
It was not pretty.
But hey! I made paper staff right?
That had to be a feat in and of itself.
I was not a "cool" kid so my selection must have been based on my writing skills.
Excuse me a minute...
(Turning away from the computer.)
Bwahahahahhahahahhaaa!
Giggle.
Snort.
Sniffle.
(Returning to the computer.)
Okay I'm back.
The following is one of my entries:
"I Bet You Didn't Know.."
by Brandi Long
That Amber Rogers is secretly married to W. Axl Rose.
(This was inaccurate information. My source was apparently corrupted.)
There are 33 pink dictionaries in Miss LaBrot's room.
(Based on the previous false information I would not be taking this information to the bank...for all we know there could have been thirty four dictionaries.)
There are 42 light bulbs in Miss Labrot's room.
(You should note, at this point, that Miss Labrot's room was, indeed where we conducted our paper staff meetings. So while I was actually supposed to be writing entertaining, stimulating articles I was, instead counting pink dictionaries and light bulbs.)
That was the end of the article.
But wait!
There's more!
I also wrote this dandy:
"Computer Club News"
by Brandi Long
Before school on Thursday, the Computer Club met.
The club was called to order by Devin Lee. Mrs. Weber discussed the money situation.
It was decided to spend the money the club had received from the Student Council fund on new software, games and joysticks.
The club will meet agin when these items, which need to be replaced, are received.
Riveting. I know.
I then co-wrote a short article with Dawn Seals entitled "Love Is..." in which we explain that you can be pretty sure it's real love when Dylan Hogan takes Marlana on a date to the Longhorn and pays for everything.
And according to us, another sure indication of love is when the rose your boyfriend sends you for that special occasion doesn't die for a month.
We obviously had a distorted view.
And now.
The article you've all been waiting for...
"Do You Know Your Future Plans"
by Paperstaff
(Though you won't understand this if you don't know these people, at least it will give you some insight into an eigth-grader's mind.)
In ten years_____________is________________________.
Chad Allen-a pig farmer
Lance Cooper-a Chippendale
(Why were we allowed to put "Chippendale" in the school paper?)
Vickey Denny-Model
Karie Francis-Mrs. Benjamin Wade Miller
(Correct!)
Cara Graham-awarded fame and fortune for finding Elvis
Micah Jowett-owner of a chain of McDonald's
(I think he's more into bacon.)
Mike Matthews-Twinkie salesman
Matt McDaniel-in jail for forgery
(I really hope he's NOT in jail. I would feel bad.)
Amy McDowell-abducted Garth Brook's child
Brent McCormack-drummer for Metallica
Brandi Long-photographer, blogger, and mother of three.
Wow. They were good!
I am astounded at their accuracy.
B
You can also see these pictures here under "High School Soccer".
1 comments:
I to am astounded at their accuracy (wink,wink)
It's to bad that gig didn't work out with that kid with Metallica or finding Elvis. Also I think you counting things in a room you were supposed to be writing in goes back to that concentration issue (A.D.D.) we've been discussing recently:)
I love rain days, because we get MORE BLOG!
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