I am a very speedy bathroom-goer.
Particularly in public.
In fact, I silently pride myself on being able to use a public restroom as fast (and on a few occasions even faster) than my husband.
This includes washing my hands.
This is probably because I'm by nature a person who does not like to mess around with mundane things like restroom going while there is life to be lived.
You can spend your time staring at profanity etched stall walls and stained floors if you please, but I prefer to be in non-toilet areas free of dampness and disease, thank you very much.
So imagine my chagrin when I encountered not one, but two toilet paper rolls of frustration and angst today while using two separate toiletry facilities.
It went something like this:
(Sorry about the visual you may be getting.)
Sit down.
Relief.
No toilet paper.
Panic.
Wait.
Fresh roll.
Tick tock, tick tock.
Unwrap roll from fancy papery cover.
Find beginning of roll.
Grapple with tiny piece of edge to begin unrolling process.
Tear.
Rip.
Shred.
Edge has apparently been super glued to the rest of the roll due to faulty toilet paper rolling machinery at the factory.
Panic.
Tick tock, tick tock.
Clawing at roll.
Bits of toilet paper begin falling to the floor.
Make a mental note to email the manufacturer about possible faulty gluing machine.
More shredding.
It is now snowing toilet paper in my stall.
I have destroyed half the roll of paper without successfully obtaining the few squares of intact paper I need for my toiletry purposes.
I then count my losses, wad up the bits of paper that I managed to keep in my hand during the massacre and make do because frankly, I should have been eating popcorn at that moment.
And yes, I was subjected to this torture twice in one day.
The horror!
*sigh*
I hate stressful toilet time.
B
You can see the rest of this session here under "Meister Baby".
2 comments:
What is it about Priester women that we feel compelled to be out of the bathroom before or at the same time as Priester men? A question for the ages (or not), I was just glad to see it wasn't just me:)
That is one of the most beautiful babies i have ever seen!!!
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